My official weigh in is tomorrow and I feel good. I joined SparkPeople and am addicted! I have been over there and neglecting all of my other journals and forums. I am pretty sure that I will have lost 2 or 3 lbs this week. :) Yay for me!

Ok - this is short but I'll update tomorrow!

My weigh in 

271.6

Grrr...  Well, I had Mongolian Grill Saturday night - all chicken and veggies, but lots of salt and I ate more than I should. I also didn't get enough water in. 

So yesterday I did really well, but I didn't get enough calories. So today I'm back to tracking and trying my best! I'm going to keep up with my water, which I also did yesterday. I'm adding exercise again today as well. 

I really think just cutting calories doesn't work for me. It's the type of foods too, and exercise. I don't want to give up my carbs and dairy, but it might be the only way. Sigh.

Back to the grindstone for me. Off to exercise while the baby is still sleeping.

I'm down 5 lbs! (ok, technically .4 shy of 5 lbs - but I started above 275 but just rounded down for simplicity. I know I'll be below 270 tomorrow so it's all good!)

I didn't really kick it in gear until Tuesday of last week even though I started on Sunday. I did ok on Sun and Mon but I really got my ZAP in the pants to do it and do it right on Tuesday!

Saturday I even went out to dinner. We went to Outback. I got the 7 oz fillet, steamed veggies and sweet potato. I told them no butter when I ordered the veggies, but the sweet potato came with a glob of it! I quickly removed it and put it in the *unused* butter dish from the bread (that I only had a small slice of!) I figured just a tad wouldn't hurt, but next time I'm going to make sure I get no butter - or send it back.

Hubby is jumping on the bandwagon too - although it's harder for him with work. He's trying though. He's being supportive of me too. Last time we lost together and I really relied on him, I think I'm going to have to be his support this time around. But that's ok - I can do it!

I am going to try exercising three times this week. I was going to go today, but we are all iced up here so we can't go to the gym. I guess I can do our machines, but somehow those just aren't as fun! I can still hear my kids fighting, and the baby needs me etc. It's nice to go and not have to worry about house type stuff.

And I jumped back in to the 3 Fat Chicks website. I used it with South Beach before and enjoyed it. So I'm excited to get to know others. I joined the 100 lb club - I'll see if there are any other groups that interst me too.

That's all - just an update and my weigh in. When the weather gets better, I'm going to go buy my mindless magazine, and get a bubble bath in after the kids go to bed - and thoroughly enjoy my reward! I usually take a few bubble baths a week - but I have not since I started since I was using it as a reward. Same with magazines, I usually buy them if they look interesting - but I have been waiting til I met my goal. I'm using extreme self-restraint here, on so many levels. :)

From last year...

I want...

To hike Diamondhead Mountain on Oahu and bike Haleakala Crater on Maui.
To walk in a room and not calculate if I'm the fattest person there.
To put on a bathing suit and not add three extra layers to cover up my body.
To walk down the stairs in a sexy dress and hear my husband whistle at me.
To sit in an airplane seat and not feel like I'm squishing out of it.
To get on any ride without worrying about if I'll fit, even the kiddie rides with my kids.
To do a somersault again.
To take family photos - happily.
To play on the floor with babies, even my grandchildren someday (a LONG ways away!)
To break into a run to catch something - a dog running away or a flying piece of paper - and not have to think about it.
To have curves instead of rolls.
To be thin enough so that I can plan meetings with old friends or online friends and not be worried about how I look.
To shop in the regular sizes again.
To live a long, happy, healthy life.


Looks good to me - but I can add more:

To not have my knees hurt anymore and not need surgery someday
To not have my baby boy know me at this weight - ever. If he sees old photos, I don't want him to recognize me!
To learn how to ski: water and snow.
To lay naked on my bed without using sheets and pillows to strategically hide things!
To be a role model to my children.

I'm doing good!

Wed:

Egg and cheese breakfast burrito
Pear
Turkey and whole wheat sandwich
Orange - clementine
Lean Cuisine Pizza and carrot sticks
Clif Bar
(I think I had some other stuff - can't remember!)

Thurs:

Oatmeal - plain
2 clementines
PB and Banana on Whole Wheat
Chicken breast (2 oz) Broccoli and 1/2 potato
4 Dark M&M's
4 Fish Sticks (found a brand with 6 grams of fat, 15 grams carbs)
Broccoli
Snackwells cookie and fat free tapioca pudding

So far today:

Grapenuts and milk
Banana
Whole Wheat Turkey sandwich (with low fat mayo and reduced fat cheese)
4 dark M&M's

Goals:

Current Weight – 275

Mini-Goal #1 – 245 by March 10th
Mini-Goal #2 - 215 by June 27th
Mini-Goal #3 – 199 by August 18th
Mini-Goal #4 – 175 by October 2nd

Long Term Goal – 150 by Jan 2007 – Lifetime Goal

Rewards:

270 – Get a magazine and Bubble Bath
260 – Get a new Hairstyle
250 – Paid Subscription to Live Journal
240 – Spend $30 at store of my choice – Scrapbook, Bath and body etc.
230 – Half hour massage
225 – Get Highlights/Color
220 – Buy new shorts/capris for summer
210 – Go for makeover, try new products – Bare Minerals, Cosmetics Counter
199 – Brighton Wallet
190 – Hour long massage
180 – New underwear, bras and a sexy nightie!
175 – Laser Hair Removal
160 - New Makeup – Bare Minerals?
150 – Trip to New York, Shopping! (and a show!)

How cliche - starting over with the new year.

However, I'm doing it and I'm happy about it. I'm always excited for a change. I HAVE been successful at this before, and I'd like to think that I will be this time! I was on my way last time, but ended up pregnant and took a break from weight loss. Now, I'm about 10 lbs more than before and even more motivated to keep on going.

I'm doing my version of 6 week body makeover and using Fit Day.

My sample menu:

Breakfast: Oatmeal, Morningstar Breakfast Patty, Fruit
Snack: Fruit, Chicken
Lunch: Salad with Tuna, RyKrisp
Snack: Carrots, Chicken
Dinner: Mahi Mahi, Brown Rice, Steamed Veggies
Dessert: Sugar Free Jello or 100 calorie pudding or fruit

The basic idea is lean meats, good carbs, fruits and vegetables.

100 oz of water, supplements, cut down on refined carbs, salt and sugars.
I'll add exercise later, probably next week.

*slowly sneaks back into my journal....*

Hey, yeah I disappeared over the holiday weekend. I had such good intentions of being good. Started with my Dinner at my BIL's house, where I was going to eat good since I was having MY TDay dinner the next day with Hubby. Well, I have to admit I have eaten more in years past and only had one piece of pie :) Then on Friday, Hubby thought that BBQ would be better since we were watching Football games and we decided to save our Turkey Dinner on Sunday. That just started a weekend of bad eating. We had our pumpkin pie on Friday because I thought it wouldn't last til Sunday. Saturday was more BBQ leftovers. Yesterday I made my Turkey and Ham Dinner. I gave in and made stuffing, the one thing I WASN'T going to make because it is my major downfall. But other than that I made:

Turkey Breast and Ham, Mashed Potatoes - made with Fat Free Cream Cheese, Sugar free Cranberry Jell-O, Sauteed Green Beans and Canadian Bacon, Bottled Gravy (low fat) and a lower sugar, lower fat Apple Cheesecake. It really wasn't that bad.... except for the amount of each thing I ate!

Today I got my second autoship, but I still have lots of food from my first order (also because I ended up with 2 free weeks instead of 1) I was planning on doing NS food today, but I had Turkey Breast and more stuffing... but that's ok. I'm still going to stay within 1200 calories and have NS for dinner. I'll make hubby and kids eat all the leftovers tonight. I'm ready to get back on. I haven't weighed since Saturday and I was up about 2 lbs, which I attribute at least half to water. Today I'm chugging away and we'll see where that leaves me. I think I didn't do too much damage!

At least the #300 worth of food that just came today makes me more motivated to eat good. I mean why mess up on the plan when you are paying so much for their food, you know?

I'll catch up and do a REAL post since it's been a while. I have actually treid all the food I have now and only a couple I havne't posted yet. Oh wait, I still haven't tried Pot Raost... uggh. Maybe tonight, but the Ravioli sound soooo good right now!

On Saturday I had my 3 weeek weigh in and I have lost..... drum roll.... 7 lbs! That means I've broken my 2 lbs a week run and lost 3 last week. That's ok, because I'll probably only lose 1 this week!

I found some more NS people on LJ - that's so cool! Yeah :)

Ok... confession time. I binged last night. First time really besides just having a small piece of candy or a JellO pudding cup etc. It started with just a really long day with my kids and I went to get them haircuts. There was a long wait so I took them to Red Robin. I got the Chicken Salad, but when it came tossed in dressing I didn't send it back. BUT I didn't eat the little garlic breads that came with it. Then we went to the grocery store and got my kids a brownie mix to make and I picked up the Sugar Free, Reduced Fat Pillsbury cookies. When I got home, after my kids were in bed and I had a chance to relax, I ate two of them (not cooked!) Then I was staying up late waiting for my hubby to call (he's out of town) and I just got lonely and bored - so I decided to cook up more of the cookies and while they cooked, I ate some Halloween candy out of the freezer. AARRGGH! Why do I do this to myself? I was TOTALLY aware, TOTALLY didn't want to deal with the consequences, but chose anyway. Grrr....

But as they say ... today is a new day. The name of my journal is "No Day But Today" meaning today is the day I need to work on my life, not tomorrow, not the next day. If I fall off, that shouldn't start a 3 day binge of feeling sorry for myself. I just need to take each day as it comes. (And the song is from RENT my favorite musical and it's coming out in the theater TOMORROW!)

So that is my catch up. You know, I started this as a weight loss journal - I have my own personal journal too that is seperate. It's funny how when my life stresses are more weight related, I write in here more - and then I write less in my personal journal. I'm trying to write in both, but it's getting harder to seperate my life out into two parts. I'll now go and write about my bad day in my personal journal too... maybe not about the binging, but all the other things that happened to trigger the binge. But like I said... today is a new day!

Here is what I posted on the NS board tonight about the Chocolate Mochaccino Dessert Bar

went to the pantry to get a caramel dessert bar and grabbed a Mochaccino bar. I thought...oooh I forgot I had this. So I made cup of Diet Cocoa and sat down to eat it watch ER. First bite. uggh. Ok, must have got a burnt bean. Second Bite. OMG - I'm going to gag. Ok. Drink water. Third Bite, gag, run to trash.

I couldn't decide if it tasted like used coffee grounds or tobacco. Uck. And I like coffee. I like chocolate covered coffee beans.

So since I was in the mood for chocolate now, I got a Chocolate biscotti to dip in my cocoa. Those aren't great either, but MUCH better than the Mochaccino.

Uggh...I actually feel really sick right now and I can't get the ashtray/burnt coffee beans taste out of my mouth and my tummy is revolting on me. My first "Hell No" I'm not eating this. I ate Mashers (as soup...) but I ate those. I ate Muffins. (with lots of other stuff!) but I ate those too. Ick... I'm making myself sick thinking about it. Gonna go have a mint and brush my teeth and try to get some sleep.